Open Letter to Adult Swim: Your Saturday Lineup Sucks

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This is the nerd in me speaking. If you’re looking for something healthcare or nursing related, click any of the other links, it will likely land you on something more appropriate. This little rant is all about Adult Swim, Cartoon Network, and the suckiness of their weekend lineup.

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Although I have a great affection the for the Japanese, and their animation, I personally have no desire to watch hours and hours of them every weekend. It shouldn’t matter. If I were a normal human being on a normal schedule then I wouldn’t be up at 3am on a Saturday, and it wouldn’t matter that Ghost in the Shell is on rather than something worth watching like Robot Chicken, King of the Hill, or American Dad. Or heck, I’ve even come to love the oddities and eccentricities of the likes of The Mighty Boosh and Squidbillies. But because  I have to a be 3rd shift freak, I find myself up at 3am on Saturday and when I turn to me reliable Adult Swim for the warm glow of background comedic TV entertainment, I am faced with some dramatic, over-the-top drama about demons, or some other crazy Anime obsession.

It sucks. I don’t like it. And surely I am not alone in this.

Do I think you (the powers that be at Adult Swim) are just going to up and change your whole lineup for me… not hardly. Although, how cool would that be. I could totally be blogosphere famous and you might even do one of those black and white cuts that says something like:

“The Nerdy Nurse – we heard you. Here’s some King of the Hill. Now stop whining”

And then of course you’d play the regular line-up because that’s what the cool-kids do, and 6 days out of the week, you’re totally a cool kid.

Just Not on Saturday

Chibi-3But Saturday… on Saturday, Adult Swim becomes the geekiest loser on the planet. Oh geez, I bet you guy totally embrace furries and everything…. weirdos.

I bet you even bought this book: How To Be An Anime Character – admit it. The hilarious reviews alone almost make me want to spring the $25.

In case you were wondering about my general opinions of the Adult swim programming, I’ll sum it up for you below.

Awesome: Robot Chicken, King of the Hill, Family Guy, Squidbillies, The Mighty Boosh, American Dad, Home Movies, Aqua Teen Hunger Force,

Weirded out by, but not sure if I love or hate them: Metalocalypse, Assy McGee, Eagleheart, Superjail, Mango Wrestling Alliance, Look Around You, Tom & Eric Awesome Show: Great Job, Tom Goes to the Mayor,

Suck: Children’s Hospital, Delocated, Bleach, Ghost in the Shell, Cowboy Bebop, Durarara!!, Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, InuYasha, Kekkaishi,

And seriously, Adult Swim, when on earth are you going to get your own channel? Waking up to Garfield and Scooby Doo is seriously weirding me out.

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Comments

  1. Alpa Chino says

    I agree with you about how much the Anime weekend segments suck–if anyone wants to watch that stuff they should look online–what REALLY REALLY REEEEAAALLY sucks is American Dad and Family Guy taking up more time every night than every other show combined.

    Family Guy and American Dad come on 10 times a day on different channels, and a few instances of their showings even directly overlap Adultswim showings. It is redundant, and that is purely why AS is almost unwatchable for me these days. I wanna watch that garbage I could get it from any number of places.

    Just wait, next they are going to be showing Cleveland Show. Uggghh.

    • says

      I appreciate the variety of adult swim. I hate it when they get hung-up on one show and show it 4x in one night. There is enough variety in their shows that they could rearrange the lineup, if they so choose, without making half the night family guy.

      • Xavier says

        I’ve got to disagree.Robot Chicken,and other shows on adult swim have got to be the most boring,unfunny,poorly animated,stereotypical,brain dead,over-rated,(excuse my language)piece of shit.
        Boondocks,American Dad,Family guy,Aqua Teen(not the stupid delta squad thing they have now),and maybe King of the Hill are the only good non-anime related shows on [as].
        I don’t see how adult swims anime line up is the “geekiest loser on the planet”.Anime’s not the ones riding nostalgia boners,making cliche 2005,over used jokes with the most cheesy stereotypes.I bet the same people who think they’re the coolest people in the world for shooting milk out their nose,quote every thing Stewie says.Robot Chicken-sorry but,people break-dancing,and getting nut-shots,get’s boring after a while(yes I know that’s not all it’s about).
        Anime is probably the best thing to happen to adult swim,if they want to admit it or not .It’s not the funniest but it’s the most interesting,plots are better,and story is deeper,that’s why toonami was brought back,adult swim is used by the viewers for anime mostly,though you still have your daily watchers like me for american dad,and such,but toonami is adultswim’s peak of my interest(though most anime on there isn’t great).

  2. Fukyouz says

    What should be circled in red is the Huffington post, douche. Oh, and Robot Chicken is the biggest turd on tv and the internet. Kill yourself. That is all.

  3. AvidAxe says

    What the hell,you don’t just diss CowboyBebop.It’s a great show,I bet you haven’t even seen it and are just being a subjective prick about it,because it’s anime.Fuck you.

  4. Solid_Intervention says

    Are seriously talking shit avout master pieces like Ghost in The Shell and Cowboy Bebop, while praising pieces of shit like Family Guy and American dad? The weekdays on adultswim are fucking horrible.
    I’m not seeing Family Guy or American dad with a coherent plot or developed characters. That’s expected though, it’s a comedy. BUT THEY EVEN FAIL AT THAT. They rely on recycled humor, and poor references to get by.The insanely cliché characters aren’t helping either(though maybe that’s intended). Aqua Teen, is decent I’ll admit. It’s nothing great though, it’s writing isn’t that great and characters get old. Robot Chicken uses recycled shit as well, they just try to put something in an insanely ridiculous situation.
    Replace your “suck”, with your “awesome”(But leave Children’s Hospital, Delocated, Inuyasha, and Bleach) and I think we’re a bit more accurate.
    Ghost in The Shell has a great and deep story with developed characters. As does Cowboy Bebop. FMA approaches alchemist with an interesting plot, “Durarara!!” is a pretty good mystery with a coherent story. These aspects aren’t relative to a comedy sitcom(or the like on “as), but they’re ACTUALLY GOOD AT WHAT THEY DO.
    I don’t even like anime as much as I used to, now that most of it’s Weaboo-Moe- Mindless sexual humor(What you seems to generalize anime fans as), but I can still distinguish the masterpieces(Yu Yu Hakusho, Trigun, Peace Maker) from the decent(Kuroko’s Basketball, Attack on Titan), and the terrible (Sword Art Online, Fairy Tail, Bleach, Black Butler, Guilty Crown).
    I get that this is your opinion, but that was unreasonable, and with no factual points.

  5. says

    Lousy article. You did nothing but talk down to anime fans calling them geeks and nerds, when I bet you really haven’t given shows like Cowboy Bebop or Ghost in the Shell a real watch. Especially Cowboy Bebop, which is a classic and beloved by many, including the people at Adult Swim for its character development, great storylines, amazing soundtrack, and stunning visuals and voice acting for the time. It even has funny episodes like Toys in the Attic and Mushroom Samba. Not to mention Family Guy and American Dad are far from humorous shows, Family Guy started out decent, but has now just become shock value and pop culture references, as well as a way for Seth MacFarlane to preach to his audience. Home Movies is a hilarious show and one of my favorites, Aqua Teen is alright, though it went downhill when they started changing the show’s name every season. Robot Chicken is hit or miss. Overall, I don’t think you gave the anime shows a fair shake, and I don’t think you ever will because you group anime fans in with furries and weirdos. You also think anime is weird melodrama, when in reality, they tell fantastic stories and are in general, just amazing shows. Go into Cowboy Bebop or Fullmetal Alchemist with an open mind and tell me they aren’t amazing shows. I bet you couldn’t.

    ~RogerSmith2004,
    Animation Enthusiast

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