Hello, my name is NurseBrittney, and I can’t throw crap away.
No, I’m not one of those weirdos that keeps old pumpkins or piles and piles of old newspaper, but I do keep things I haven’t used in years. Why? Well, I might need them again, and at some point and time, I or someone else paid good money for it and I’d rather not spend money on something I don’t have to.
I suppose this fact rains true for everyone. Most people don’t want to waste money. But why are most people able to let go of ‘stuff’ so much better than I? I have clothes I haven’t worn in 8 years, from high school, sitting in boxes in my basement. My logic for keeping these: I might be able to wear them again. But truthfully, would I even want to? I was pretty flamboyant in the fashion area in my younger years, and I don’t think it would be what most would consider appropriate mommy attire. So now why must I keep them? Surely someone somewhere might could get the use of of them.
But then, you know what my wacky mind full of excuses does? It justifies keeping them because maybe I might want to make a quilt or something out of them. I could use the fabric for something. But will I? No, probably not, because that would take far too much effort.
My house is clean, but anywhere there is a flat, elevated surface, stuff tends to pile, and once a week or so I have to force myself to go through these ‘things’ and find a home or *shutter* throw them away.
Its a disease, I’m sure of it. My mother did the same thing. Her house was immaculate for most of my life, she cleaned compulsively, but open a closet and there it was, crap piled to the ceiling. My mother actually added on to the house and built another building on the property to hold all her crap. Stuff she had acquired along side of the road, dumpster diving, that someone gave her. Almost none of it she actually bought. And no one else was entitled to any of her stuff. Unless you wanted to pay her “what she had in it” or what she considered it fair market value to be. Such a quirky woman, my mother.
Now I am not this bad. I often do attempt to give items away to people that I feel will use them, but I don’t want them to be thrown away. I had a very hard time parting with many of my sons baby clothes. Not because he wore them, because most of him he didn’t, but because if they were going to leave my home I wanted them to be worn. How messed up is that. They sat in my son’s closet unworn, but if they are to see the light of day again, I want an assurance they will be used.
I have to figure out how to squash this quirk of mine. I have to.
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